FABULOUS news! I went for the ultrasound this morning, and there are still viable follicles!!!!! *pause. happy dance. shake ya tailfeather* There are at least 4 that could mature enough to be good eggs, with the lead follicles (the biggest ones) being 13 mm and 15 mm. Keep in mind that follicle isn't considered "mature" until it's 18-20 mm, and they grow at 1 to 2 mm a day. SO I'm still a few days away, but NOT TOTALLY OUT! The ultrasound wasn't too unpleasant, and the staff was really friendly. I went for acupuncture tonight, which was SUCH a welcome rest after the crazy weekend.
*Non Fertility Related Moment*
Our sewer system backed up last night and there was poop spewing from every orifice in the house. If this was some sort of test, I think I passed, but Oh. My. Goodness. The gross factor was unimaginable.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Aside:
TWO months of Clomid and no inseminations. The cavewoman in me is screaming "YOU ARE WASTING PRECIOUS EGGS!!! LIMITED SUPPLY! SUSTAIN CIVILIZATION!"
The Temps Don't Lie
Basal Body Temperature (BBT) is the temperature immediately upon waking. Before I wiggle around, pee, make the coffee, or check my phone I rummage around under the pillow for my Basal Body Thermometer, listen for the beep, and slide it under my tongue.
BBT is a wonderfully addictive and informative way to track your cycles, but you need to have some sort of chart to add the data to in order to see the patterns. BBT's have very specific patterns each month, and it becomes easy and natural to find those patterns once charted out. There are different variations of "normal" but you will almost always have at least a biphasic chart (2 phases) meaning lower temperatures before ovulation and higher temperatures after ovulation. It's really fascinating actually. Here's an example of my chart from last month. I use FertilityFriend, which is helpful because it also lets you track symptoms, cervical mucous, position, and medications.
Ok, so you can see that my temperatures were generally lower during the first part of my cycle, then I got a big dip (this doesn't always happen, but is really helpful when it does) right before ovulation, followed by huge jump during/immediately after ovulation. THEN the temps stay high. The longer the temps stay high, the better. If they stay high past the day you would normally start your next cycle, then there's a very good chance you're pregnant. A big drop later in this phase usually means you will start your period the next day. In this chart, the program is putting together all of my information to estimating ovulation (it probably actually happened one day sooner though, after the drop). Once you have 2-3 months of charting, the program gets smarter, and more accustomed to your patterns therefore becoming more accurate the more you use it. There is also an overlay feature so that you can compare months/cycles on the same graph.
One thing about the temperatures, they don't lie. As much as I didn't want to see that temp drop in my chart yesterday, I knew in my heart we missed it this month, and my huge jump today confirmed it.
Here's to starting all over again. *clinks my giant cup of coffee* I'm going to go ahead with internal ultrasound on Monday to check on things in there post Clomid and make sure there aren't any problems. I'm guessing the Clomid is the culprit for these last two bizarre and short cycles, so I guess we'll try our hand at a natural cycle next month. (now where did I put that butter knife....)
BBT is a wonderfully addictive and informative way to track your cycles, but you need to have some sort of chart to add the data to in order to see the patterns. BBT's have very specific patterns each month, and it becomes easy and natural to find those patterns once charted out. There are different variations of "normal" but you will almost always have at least a biphasic chart (2 phases) meaning lower temperatures before ovulation and higher temperatures after ovulation. It's really fascinating actually. Here's an example of my chart from last month. I use FertilityFriend, which is helpful because it also lets you track symptoms, cervical mucous, position, and medications.
Ok, so you can see that my temperatures were generally lower during the first part of my cycle, then I got a big dip (this doesn't always happen, but is really helpful when it does) right before ovulation, followed by huge jump during/immediately after ovulation. THEN the temps stay high. The longer the temps stay high, the better. If they stay high past the day you would normally start your next cycle, then there's a very good chance you're pregnant. A big drop later in this phase usually means you will start your period the next day. In this chart, the program is putting together all of my information to estimating ovulation (it probably actually happened one day sooner though, after the drop). Once you have 2-3 months of charting, the program gets smarter, and more accustomed to your patterns therefore becoming more accurate the more you use it. There is also an overlay feature so that you can compare months/cycles on the same graph.
One thing about the temperatures, they don't lie. As much as I didn't want to see that temp drop in my chart yesterday, I knew in my heart we missed it this month, and my huge jump today confirmed it.
Here's to starting all over again. *clinks my giant cup of coffee* I'm going to go ahead with internal ultrasound on Monday to check on things in there post Clomid and make sure there aren't any problems. I'm guessing the Clomid is the culprit for these last two bizarre and short cycles, so I guess we'll try our hand at a natural cycle next month. (now where did I put that butter knife....)
Saturday, August 28, 2010
It's All About The Spit
I rambled on before about OPKs (ovulation predictor kits) and how unbelievably maddening they can be especially for some lucky folks *myself included*. OPKs are normally urine based, they range from super cheap, to ridiculously expensive, and can provide lots of peace of mind and direction or total confusion and frustration, but usually some mix of all four. We'll talk more about peeing on things later, today is all about another fun bodily fluid, SPIT.
OPKs mostly measure Lh (lutenizing hormone) the hormone that surges immediately before ovulation to shove that eggy outta there. It is normally detectable in urine 12-48 hours before ovulation. This is that magic window we're shooting (pun intended) at with IUI/ICI. The problem is when you are shipping frozen sperm in a 22lb tank from California to Texas, you need more than 12 hours notice. ALSO, sometimes the Lh surge isn't detectable, or is easy to miss, in which case you miss ovulation and wait ANOTHER MONTH to do it all over again. Most sperm banks will guarantee the quality of the sperm out of the bank, in the tank for no more than 7 days. (That was a Dr. Suess moment, no?) Some of them only five. So basically, counting a day or two shipping each way, you have to hit it pretty dang close to have them on hand for possible ovulation, and still be able to get them back to the bank if you don't end up using them. Remember, we're talking about $2,000 worth sperm flying around here.
Enter OvaCue--
The OvaCue fertility monitor measure Lh in your saliva. Evidently Lh shows up first in saliva, then your blood, and finally urine. SO the Ovacue can give you a "Peak Day" estimation five to seven days ahead of time *and the crowd goes wild*! This is priceless information for folks in my situation, and helps SO much in scheduling/shipping/medicating etc. You put the sensor on your tongue for five seconds first thing every morning, before eating, drinking and brushing your teeth, and it magically (in my humble opinion) gives you your reading. You can also purchase it's magic accessory (which actually *does* look like a magic wand) the Vaginal Sensor to confirm ovulation after the fact. While that part might seem inconsequential, since it is *after the fact* it's actually priceless. The sensor gives you an idea of how your ovulation symptoms correlate to ACTUAL ovulation AND let's you know after an insemination how good your timing was.
Below is an example of my current-ish (August) OvaCue screen. As the blue days get darker, I'm getting closer to my "peak" day of estimated ovulation. August the 10th was my darkest peak day, and then it turned pink because I got ovulation confirmation that night. You can also see that it has already estimated my fertile period for September, but those dates will most likely adjust with more readings, and as it gets closer. I can see how it would be SUPER helpful to couples conceiving the old fashioned way (notice I didn't say "normal") and with an endless supply of sperm, but it is especially helpful for those of us that are having our swimmers flown in, and having to be so specific on timing. I've had ovulation confirmation on my "peak" day every cycle so far! I'm IMPRESSED!
OPKs mostly measure Lh (lutenizing hormone) the hormone that surges immediately before ovulation to shove that eggy outta there. It is normally detectable in urine 12-48 hours before ovulation. This is that magic window we're shooting (pun intended) at with IUI/ICI. The problem is when you are shipping frozen sperm in a 22lb tank from California to Texas, you need more than 12 hours notice. ALSO, sometimes the Lh surge isn't detectable, or is easy to miss, in which case you miss ovulation and wait ANOTHER MONTH to do it all over again. Most sperm banks will guarantee the quality of the sperm out of the bank, in the tank for no more than 7 days. (That was a Dr. Suess moment, no?) Some of them only five. So basically, counting a day or two shipping each way, you have to hit it pretty dang close to have them on hand for possible ovulation, and still be able to get them back to the bank if you don't end up using them. Remember, we're talking about $2,000 worth sperm flying around here.
Enter OvaCue--
The OvaCue fertility monitor measure Lh in your saliva. Evidently Lh shows up first in saliva, then your blood, and finally urine. SO the Ovacue can give you a "Peak Day" estimation five to seven days ahead of time *and the crowd goes wild*! This is priceless information for folks in my situation, and helps SO much in scheduling/shipping/medicating etc. You put the sensor on your tongue for five seconds first thing every morning, before eating, drinking and brushing your teeth, and it magically (in my humble opinion) gives you your reading. You can also purchase it's magic accessory (which actually *does* look like a magic wand) the Vaginal Sensor to confirm ovulation after the fact. While that part might seem inconsequential, since it is *after the fact* it's actually priceless. The sensor gives you an idea of how your ovulation symptoms correlate to ACTUAL ovulation AND let's you know after an insemination how good your timing was.
Below is an example of my current-ish (August) OvaCue screen. As the blue days get darker, I'm getting closer to my "peak" day of estimated ovulation. August the 10th was my darkest peak day, and then it turned pink because I got ovulation confirmation that night. You can also see that it has already estimated my fertile period for September, but those dates will most likely adjust with more readings, and as it gets closer. I can see how it would be SUPER helpful to couples conceiving the old fashioned way (notice I didn't say "normal") and with an endless supply of sperm, but it is especially helpful for those of us that are having our swimmers flown in, and having to be so specific on timing. I've had ovulation confirmation on my "peak" day every cycle so far! I'm IMPRESSED!
Friday, August 27, 2010
Pertinent
"...I feel, the steady pull of things that I can't see,
And I like it..."
~Jonatha Brooke- Steady Pull
And I like it..."
~Jonatha Brooke- Steady Pull
Monday, August 23, 2010
Stick It To Me Baby
Oh the things you suddenly become open minded to when it comes to fertility. On the recommendation of several other women on the TTC roller coaster, and my lovely therapist, I decided that spending an hour or so with dozens of little needles stuck in me sounded like JUST THE THING I needed. Turns out when Googling "Acupuncture" in El Paso, you only get two results, so at least I wasn't overwhelmed with choices. I picked the one that had the prettier website (really, cause that's how I roll), and emailed for an appointment.
A few hours later I got a phone call from the calmest woman on the planet. NO. REALLY. She had a soft spoken, slowish speech, and sounded happy. Over the phone. It was one of those moments that make you stop for a second and realize this is a "moment". She worked me in to accommodate my insemination schedule, and I set about looking forward to our appointment two days later.
Her office was about 30 minutes away from my house, and I relished the time to gather myself beforehand. The building was AWESOME. It's an old house in the historical district, and the second I walked in I felt a difference. Im not crazy, (ok...I am crazy, but not about this). It was so cute on the inside. Calm and clean, but bright, warm and inviting, and just the coolest old house anyway with crown molding and a stone fireplace. The energy in that building was perfect, and I felt calm and ready right away.
Enter Acupuncturist.
She had the brightest smile ever, and filled the room right when she walked in. She wore the exact same green scrubs that we wear at our clinic every day, short hair, glasses, and no jewelry. (Important detail to follow-->) She had the best handshake. Strong and firm and determined. This detail really stuck with me after the fact. We filled out some paperwork, looked over the labs that I brought, and then headed back into one of the treatment rooms. I think I kept saying "This is the greatest house", "I love this building", "this is such a great place"! She did a full round of medical questions, fertility questions, looked at my tongue, took my pulse, and up on the table I went. I was face up with my legs up on a block, and still felt abnormally calm. (Aside: I am never, ever, ever calm)
She talked softly, and a slightly slower than a normal conversation, and continued to ask me questions about my inseminations, plans, sperm, etc. I hardly even noticed when she inserted the first needle between my eyes, but I felt the energy from it immediately. The best way to describe it is the feeling that you get when you try to push two magnets together that are the same polarity, you know that "force" that pushes back? It's a milder version of that. Before I knew it she was smiling big and saying "You're all set! Here's the bell for you to ring if you need me, if not, Ill be back in 45 minutes." She told me to relax, breathe, visualize, and rest, which is exactly what I set about doing. This turned out to be more difficult than expected because A) I wanted to know where all the needles were, and what they looked like, and B)I kept thinking THIS IS SO DANG COOL!!! After carefully raising each arm & leg to get a look at my Frankenstein moment, I settled in for the most relaxing half hour I've had in years.
She knocked lightly and came back in, telling me to stay still and "in the zone", and how did I feel? "To be honest, that is the stillest I have been in oh....say..... 27 years!!!" She said "it's amazing what happens when I pin folks to the table"! She removed the needles effortlessly, and we talked about scheduling for our next session. As I got up from the table I felt myself breathing deeper and easier, and feeling calm and quiet. We proceeded back to the front, scheduled my follow up, and went over pricing. She had a "fertility package" already in place! Knew what she was doing! Had experience with all of this mess! I was thrilled. She gave me the biggest real hug, and sent me on my way.
I cried when I hit the car door. For the first time I felt like I had a REAL ally in this whole mess. Someone who understood all of the process and the jargon, genuinely knew what I was dealing with, and how to help me physically and emotionally. I never felt like a bother, or a mess, or crazy (well, crazier than normal), I felt like I finally had someone else to bear a portion of this massive weight. On top of all of that, I felt calm, hopeful, and peaceful.
I've been back several times since, and the awesomeness doesn't wear off. These are "moments". Last visit I asked "Do you think I'll ever be as calm as you?", her answer, very sweetly, was "No".
A few hours later I got a phone call from the calmest woman on the planet. NO. REALLY. She had a soft spoken, slowish speech, and sounded happy. Over the phone. It was one of those moments that make you stop for a second and realize this is a "moment". She worked me in to accommodate my insemination schedule, and I set about looking forward to our appointment two days later.
Her office was about 30 minutes away from my house, and I relished the time to gather myself beforehand. The building was AWESOME. It's an old house in the historical district, and the second I walked in I felt a difference. Im not crazy, (ok...I am crazy, but not about this). It was so cute on the inside. Calm and clean, but bright, warm and inviting, and just the coolest old house anyway with crown molding and a stone fireplace. The energy in that building was perfect, and I felt calm and ready right away.
Enter Acupuncturist.
She had the brightest smile ever, and filled the room right when she walked in. She wore the exact same green scrubs that we wear at our clinic every day, short hair, glasses, and no jewelry. (Important detail to follow-->) She had the best handshake. Strong and firm and determined. This detail really stuck with me after the fact. We filled out some paperwork, looked over the labs that I brought, and then headed back into one of the treatment rooms. I think I kept saying "This is the greatest house", "I love this building", "this is such a great place"! She did a full round of medical questions, fertility questions, looked at my tongue, took my pulse, and up on the table I went. I was face up with my legs up on a block, and still felt abnormally calm. (Aside: I am never, ever, ever calm)
She talked softly, and a slightly slower than a normal conversation, and continued to ask me questions about my inseminations, plans, sperm, etc. I hardly even noticed when she inserted the first needle between my eyes, but I felt the energy from it immediately. The best way to describe it is the feeling that you get when you try to push two magnets together that are the same polarity, you know that "force" that pushes back? It's a milder version of that. Before I knew it she was smiling big and saying "You're all set! Here's the bell for you to ring if you need me, if not, Ill be back in 45 minutes." She told me to relax, breathe, visualize, and rest, which is exactly what I set about doing. This turned out to be more difficult than expected because A) I wanted to know where all the needles were, and what they looked like, and B)I kept thinking THIS IS SO DANG COOL!!! After carefully raising each arm & leg to get a look at my Frankenstein moment, I settled in for the most relaxing half hour I've had in years.
She knocked lightly and came back in, telling me to stay still and "in the zone", and how did I feel? "To be honest, that is the stillest I have been in oh....say..... 27 years!!!" She said "it's amazing what happens when I pin folks to the table"! She removed the needles effortlessly, and we talked about scheduling for our next session. As I got up from the table I felt myself breathing deeper and easier, and feeling calm and quiet. We proceeded back to the front, scheduled my follow up, and went over pricing. She had a "fertility package" already in place! Knew what she was doing! Had experience with all of this mess! I was thrilled. She gave me the biggest real hug, and sent me on my way.
I cried when I hit the car door. For the first time I felt like I had a REAL ally in this whole mess. Someone who understood all of the process and the jargon, genuinely knew what I was dealing with, and how to help me physically and emotionally. I never felt like a bother, or a mess, or crazy (well, crazier than normal), I felt like I finally had someone else to bear a portion of this massive weight. On top of all of that, I felt calm, hopeful, and peaceful.
I've been back several times since, and the awesomeness doesn't wear off. These are "moments". Last visit I asked "Do you think I'll ever be as calm as you?", her answer, very sweetly, was "No".
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