If It Changes Colors, I'll Pee On It

As promised, a POAS (pee on a stick) gallery!

Quick Aside: The poop came back, not anywhere close to as bad as last time, but still. Nobody in the house can smell the sewer but me, I wonder if it is the hCG still in my system from the shot? Odd. If you are really confused, you'll need to see this and possibly this.

Ok, SO I use two different types of urine OPKs. The Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor, which looks like this --------------------------------------------------->

And the Clear Blue Easy Digital, which looks like this ------------------------------------------------------->



The monitor is a long term process, it takes the first morning urine and tests for both estrogen changes and LH changes. It also stores your data each month and therefore gets more accurate to your individual cycle the more you use it. The picture above shows three things: 1. It's cycle day one 2. It's at "low" fertility 3. The "M" means it's a menstrual cycle day. Every morning you turn it on and it shows the cycle day, and then tells you whether it's a test day or not. During your period it doesn't ask you to test, and then starting CD 6 or 7 (depending on previous cycles) it starts giving flashing the "test" sign. You pee on a stick, insert it into the monitor, and in about 5 minutes it gives the result. One bar = Low, two bars= High, three bars (with a little egg in the middle) = Peak. There are two test lines on the stick, and though they say that it can't be read by the human eye, it can. With the wick end to the left, the LH line is the first one, and gets darker for your surge. The estrogen line is the second one and starts out dark to get lighter as your estrogen rises. Here is an example of a "low" stick.

As the estrogen line gets lighter (meaning higher levels) the monitor switches from "low" to "high". Here is an example of a "high" stick. The LH line is still non-existent, but the estrogen line has faded just a little. 

Anyway, you can see on this one that the estrogen line is almost all the way gone, but there still isn't an LH line.

(Aside: I'm not real sure WHAT happened with the boy/girl background colors, but I swear it was not intentional.)

And then FINALLY (after the trigger shot)

We get a "Peak".  See how the LH line is finally there, and the estrogen one isn't? Three bars AND an eggy is a happy, happy thing to see. 

Mmmkay, on the the smiley face one. This one doesn't store your information, nor does it test estrogen levels. It can *only* detect an LH surge. Again with the wick to the left, it has a test line (first) and a control line (second). You get a positive when you get two lines (just like with a pregnancy test). Once again, you are not supposed to read them with the naked eye, but I've found you *can* see subtle changes in the lines as the test gets closer to positive. Once your LH surges you get a smiley face, which again, is a great thing to see and is usually followed by a run around the house happy dance. Here's a positive stick followed by the much coveted smiley face.

WOOT WOOT!!!!!

The smiley test does not have to be first morning urine, and since A) I have to hunt my LH surge like Wiley Coyote hunts that RoadRunner and B) Sometimes a surge can be short, and if you only test in the morning there is a change you could miss it, I usually use this test in the afternoon, and sometimes even two times a day if I think I'm close to ovulation. Even with ALL of this peeing on sticks, there have been plenty of months that I never get a peak, or a smiley. I can't give you a good explanation, and it's infuriating and stressful, but the months I do get a positive OPK, it's cause for a party, or at least a happy dance for sure. 

It's All About The Spit

I rambled on before about OPKs (ovulation predictor kits) and how unbelievably maddening they can be especially for some lucky folks *myself included*. OPKs are normally urine based, they range from super cheap, to ridiculously expensive, and can provide lots of peace of mind and direction or total confusion and frustration, but usually some mix of all four. We'll talk more about peeing on things later, today is all about another fun bodily fluid, SPIT.

OPKs mostly measure Lh (lutenizing hormone) the hormone that surges immediately before ovulation to shove that eggy outta there. It is normally detectable in urine 12-48 hours before ovulation. This is that magic window we're shooting (pun intended) at with IUI/ICI. The problem is when you are shipping frozen sperm in a 22lb tank from California to Texas, you need more than 12 hours notice. ALSO, sometimes the Lh surge isn't detectable, or is easy to miss, in which case you miss ovulation and wait ANOTHER MONTH to do it all over again. Most sperm banks will guarantee the quality of the sperm out of the bank, in the tank for no more than 7 days. (That was a Dr. Suess moment, no?) Some of them only five. So basically, counting a day or two shipping each way, you have to hit it pretty dang close to have them on hand for possible ovulation, and still be able to get them back to the bank if you don't end up using them. Remember, we're talking about $2,000 worth sperm flying around here.

Enter OvaCue--

The OvaCue fertility monitor measure Lh in your saliva. Evidently Lh shows up first in saliva, then your blood, and finally urine. SO the Ovacue can give you a "Peak Day" estimation five to seven days ahead of time *and the crowd goes wild*! This is priceless information for folks in my situation, and helps SO much in scheduling/shipping/medicating etc. You put the sensor on your tongue for five seconds first thing every morning, before eating, drinking and brushing your teeth, and it magically (in my humble opinion) gives you your reading.  You can also purchase it's magic accessory (which actually *does* look like a magic wand) the Vaginal Sensor to confirm ovulation after the fact. While that part might seem inconsequential, since it is *after the fact* it's actually priceless. The sensor gives you an idea of how your ovulation symptoms correlate to ACTUAL ovulation AND let's you know after an insemination how good your timing was.

Below is an example of my current-ish (August) OvaCue screen. As the blue days get darker, I'm getting closer to my "peak" day of estimated ovulation. August the 10th was my darkest peak day, and then it turned pink because I got ovulation confirmation that night. You can also see that it has already estimated my fertile period for September, but those dates will most likely adjust with more readings, and as it gets closer. I can see how it would be SUPER helpful to couples conceiving the old fashioned way (notice I didn't say "normal") and with an endless supply of sperm, but it is especially helpful for those of us that are having our swimmers flown in, and having to be so specific on timing. I've had ovulation confirmation on my "peak" day every cycle so far! I'm IMPRESSED!

Pertinent

"...I feel, the steady pull of things that I can't see,

And I like it..."


~Jonatha Brooke- Steady Pull

Bitter Disappointment

So while it might seem that tracking ovulation here in 2010 would be an easy task, technological advancements in medicine and everything else are insane these days, so surely someone would have come up with a fool proof method of timing inseminations, or sex even, perfectly for ovulation. Such is not the case as was evident, and not for the first time, this cycle. After weeks of fertility meds, natural remedies, acupuncture, meditation, spitting on things, peeing on things and checking cervical position and mucus, and waking up to a beeping thermometer, I missed my ovulation. Therefore the $2,000 worth of sperm I have sitting in my kitchen will have to pack their little bags and head back to California today. An entire cycle, and $300 shipping wasted.

There are four common ways to track ovulation. Cervical position, cervical mucus, basal body temperature, and Lh surge. Hormone fluxes reign over your entire cycle, and you can tell a lot by what is surging, and falling. Your pituitary gland regulates these various hormones, and the timing of their rising and falling. Immediately before, usually 12-36 hours, ovulation, an Lh surge will be detectable in your urine. These tests are called OPKs, or ovulation predictor kits. They range from cheapy to super expensive, and just wading through the waters of OPKs is like being up to your neck in a quicksand pond full of alligators. Not everyone, every cycle will get a positive OPK. I have NO idea why this happens, but about a third of the time, I get nothing but negatives, yet still ovulate normally. This was one of those cycles.

Lh is first detectable in your saliva, approximately 5 days before your urine. From what I understand it goes  saliva, then blood, then urine. So for those of us trying to time the shipping of sperm, this extra notice can be extremely helpful. There is a newish machine on the market that measures your saliva every morning and anticipates your "window of fertility". This machine also has a vaginal wand that provides "ovulation confirmation". This is a jackpot for those of us TTC for multiple reasons. 1) It confirms that you are indeed ovulating, 2) Gives you the ability to track timing after the fact, i.e. okay, we inseminated today, and got ovulation confirmation tonight, so we know we got the timing right this cycle, and 3) It tells you that you can stop peeing on things and have a total breakdown because you missed your window and have to send back your sperm. (as was the case for me this cycle).

Frozen sperm lives anywhere from 8-24 hours once inseminated, so the object is to inseminate as close as possible to ovulation without missing it on either side. Most research indicates that it is virtually impossible to get pregnant by inseminating *after* ovulation, so you always want to err on the side of early.

Since I'm still in breakdown mode, I'll save basal body temperature and cervical mucus and position for another post, go have another huge bucket of coffee, and figure out how to pass the time for the next month.