∞ I was lucky enough to grow up in a family full of *unconditional love*. I didn't realize until I was older how A) Important this was and B) that not everyone grows up this way. My family was very affectionate and vocal about their feelings, and I can never remember not feeling 100% loved. I realize now how huge this is, and that it shaped every future relationship and friendship in a positive way. I know no matter how sad, mad, or disappointed I am in my kids, they will know, without hesitation, that they are loved.
∞ I can say "I'm proud of you". I think this is one of the most important things (second only to "I love you") that a parent can say to their kids. I can remember several specific events that my parents told me they were proud of me, and the confidence that gave me.
∞ I believe in the value of hard work. Inside work, outside work, manual labor, boy work, girl work, and sweat equity. I hope I can show my kids the rewards of working towards a goal.
∞ I laugh. A lot.
∞ I'm creative. I like to think outside the box.
∞ I am a problem solver. Tell me something is impossible, or that I can't do it, then hide and watch me. I'll rig up something the likes of which you've never seen to get the job done. It might take twice as long as calling someone for assistance, but so help me, I'll figure it out.
∞ I'm not a quitter.
∞ I'm not perfect, and my kids won't be either, and I'm okay with that.
∞ I take the time to cut out bunny shaped Bisquick biscuits for breakfast when I *don't* have kids.
There are some things that I think I'll struggle with too (but I'm working on it):
∞ I'm not patient. Not just not patient in a "lose my temper" way, but in a "I HATE waiting" way. I worry how I'll deal with a purple incessantly crying one month old, and a screaming, hitting two year old, and a smart mouthed 13-20 year old. I also wonder if I'll be able to slow myself down enough to not rush my kids through life, and through important moments. If I'll be able to wait for them to figure something out on their own without dashing in to do it for them.
∞ I'm very competitive, probably to a fault. I hope I can instill a *healthy* sense of competition in my kids, without pushing or pressuring them. I hope I can encourage them in things they are naturally good at, and not push them to excel at things they aren't good at or don't enjoy. This is going to be a struggle for me. I don't want to be one of those parents who live vicariously through their kids.
∞ I have high expectations, of myself as a parent, and of my kids as kids/adults/and human beings. I would rather have it this way than the other way around, but I know I may have to adjust my goals and expectations..........daily.
∞ I'm a huge people pleaser, and don't have a great sense of boundaries. I hope I can do better and teach my kids to be strong and stick to their guns.
I think the good will outweigh the bad, and I know I have a lot of work to do on myself, but I'm up for the challenge. I can't wait to get my chance.
Hey you know what? As long as you're reflective and know what you need to work on as a person/parent, that's what puts you ahead of the game. It's the nutters who think they're perfect already that struggle (and don't know it) who fumble with parenting. Gold star.
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